Monday, February 20, 2006

Population.... ME

You all know how I love traveling and yesterday I won a free trip to a little town that I've visited before: Dumpsville! It's not exactly a tourist hotspot, but it does get its share of visitors. The last time I was here, way back in '01, I stayed a long time. Checked myself in to the Heartbroken Hotel, cried into tear-stained pillows, shuffled forlornly through Pity Park and finally left town hauling out my newly acquired armloads of emotional baggage. This time, it's just a pit stop. In fact, I don't know if I'm technically in Dumpsville. Can you be dumped after less than a month of dating? No matter. There are perks to being here. First of all, it's a great place to pamper and spend money on yourself. Just being here is justification for shopping sprees, excessive drinking and all sorts of selfish acts you feel inclined to indulge in.

I can clearly see
now that it's no surprise he swerved suddenly to the exit ramp. I feel
I pack light these days; all that baggage I left with way back when has
since been compacted into a convenient carry-on size. But he had an
entire U-Haul packed to the hilt! You're never going to get anywhere with that heavy load being dragged behind you. So he has gone off
with his ex-girlfriend to examine that baggage, unpack it, repack it, perhaps reorganize, etc. I'm not a total cynic when it comes to couples getting back together, sometimes it works. But sometimes they just forget or ignore the issues that caused the break up in the first place, then go through the same heartache down the line when those problems inevitably reveal themselves. Oh heck, those two crazy kids just might make it. Or he'll need a bigger van.

Alrighty, this town is a dump, I'm out of here. No strolls down Bitter Boulevard, no lingering on Angry Avenue, and definitely not popping into self-pity city hall. Nope, that's not fun at all. I'm going to head straight out on the Fun Fling Freeway. Anyone care to give me a ride?

Oh, innuendo is so funny. Hee hee.


Laoch said...

What a bummer.  I will send negative vibrations his way.

and pretty things said...

you are too funny!
boo! he\'s lame.

Touly said...

LOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL you are too cute. Innuendo IS fun!

Heather said...

Lol..loved it.

Aileen said...

"I hope this doesn\'t affect your future relationships"

Melvin said...

LOL I can kinda picture Dumpsville, a town in the middle of nowhere with tumbleweeds blowing thru. People running up to others, trying to start conversations, but not knowing what to share and what not too share.
Your comment to my space was great, you are ginchy, in the good way of course :D but it is true I\'m always boderline evil so it\'s good to check. I love words like madame (show of respect or owner of a brothel?), or mixing up adore and abhor, love and loathe.  I\'m sorry to hear ya hit Dumpsville, but don\'t worry Sexy Swingin\' Single City, isn\'t too far away a happenin place where friends and family wine and dine!!

Trevor said...

Pretty darn good metaphor! It was so malicious as the dictionary definition of "innuendo" tends to imply:
"An indirect or subtle, usually derogatory implication in expression; an insinuation."
There were some subtle innuendoes contained in the metaphor, though. Great use of the English language!
I\'m a complete and total nerd. :o|

Miss said...

yuck.....i too was in dumpsville in \'05. It was a bitter town when I left it behind me. He moved out to Calgary I stayed in Ontario.....and that\'s perfectly fine with me now though.....cause this lady is no longer in Dumpsville......I\'m in LaLaLand. It\'s a good place to be!

Brenda said...

ahhhhhh dumpsvillle...yes i stayed there TOO long.
now i\'m a fulltime man shopper.
check it. you just click on the man u want? and he is delivered to your door.

Byllie said...

I really liked this one..................i dont know why.  i probably shouldnt have given the nature - but u have a flare for writing and your right, the inuendos are, if u got dumped by some dummy who went back to his ex, then you are right.....HE did have too much baggage.  avoid anyone who is recently out of a relationship or the dreaded jerks who are still in one but wont tell that until u find out for urself - so hard to are mental.......well, no but whatever...........
theres something different about their way of thinking......must be the lack of estrogen.

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