Tuesday, February 1, 2011

my secret blog

yeah, that's right, i had a secret blog. i created a brand new secret email address with absolutely no info about who i really was. with my new secret email address i started a new secret blog. i didn't tell anyone about it. being completely anonymous allowed me to write anything i wanted. i didn't have to be clever or funny or even kind. i could speak without fear of repercussions and unburden myself of any troublesome thoughts, emotions, or experiences that weighed on my mind. it had the confidentiality of writing in a diary, but with the occasional comment from total, objective strangers. it was very therapeutic. 

that was about two and half years ago, maybe more. i can't remember when exactly i made my last entry, but the secret blog fell by the wayside. abandoned. forgotten. then today i remembered. i decided to log in to that old secret blog and read over all my old secret thoughts. but it's gone! well, not gone exactly, but it's just a title page. the name and the tag line are there... but no posts, no archives, no evidence that i ever shared a single word. i tried futilely to log in as my secret self, only to be welcomed as a new user. for 45 minutes or so i desperately tried to access my old site and find my old entries, searching through questions and answers, help groups, etc etc etc... all paths have led to dead ends, and i have given up.

i'm sad that my old entries have been lost. my secrets have been swallowed up into some dark void, confined once more only to the private recesses of my mind.

well, at least anonymity won't be a problem.

2 comments:

CuppySkully said...

aahh that sounds like a good idea, to take anonymity to the next level...be completely nameless and selfless.
Sorry to hear about the loss of posts though. We'll learn to save a copy in our computers next time. :)

Chella said...

Oh that realllllly super sucks.

I had a secret blog for a while a few years ago but I lived in fear that someone would connect it to my public self. I can barely manage one blog and I only posted two entries.. but they were skin-me-alive honest. I can't even remember my log in info so.. it's kind of in blog purgatory. One person read it.

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